Dateline: Wanadana, Indiana
This just in: Dairy farmer Paul T’otherone has reported that one of his cows has developed markings on her side that resemble the face of The Madonna. Officials of the Catholic Church are on their way to Wanadana now to verify this latest miracle.
Holy Cow!
Neighbour Sid Splatt said this wasn’t the first time there had been a miracle in the area. “Six years ago my wife found a cow pat with a perfect likeness of President George W. Bush. But the government didn’t wanna know, and neither did the Church,” Splatt said. “On account of this one bein’ religious, I reckon the church’ll milk it for all it’s worth.”
MM
The Meandering Matriarch 
ROFL … One must restrain oneself from chortling gleefully at such religious anthropomorphism … oh bugger! … ROFL-ing again!
But it’s such a rich vein to mine…
Not as portable (nor wearable) as a crucifix with a little man on a piece of toast, but might still raise a bid on eBay.