It’s remarkable what lengths some people will go to to get a ride in an air ambulance…  It was a gorgeous day for the forty minute flight from the north of Tasmania to the south.  I didn’t really get to see much but I could appreciate that it was a splendid  day.  In addition to the pilot, I was accompanied by a charming medic who kept the morphine flowing.  What’s not to like?  Well, a lot, actually.  The thing is, as pleasant as that was, it had all started with me falling on my knees.  And my head, but that’s fairly indestructible.  What wasn’t indestructible, it turns out, was the femur that was supporting the brand new  hip prosthesis.

I don’t suppose my wonderful Uber Wizard Orthopaedic Surgeon  was terribly impressed with the way I wrecked his beautiful handiwork.  The evidence for that supposition is the fact that following the second round of surgery — to repair the damage — he is determined to keep me here in the hospital so that I don’t do any further damage.  Now that my house has been sold, I don’t have any place to go to anyway.   When I do leave here, I wish to go up north again.  But for now that’s too far away for him to keep an eye on me.  I’m not allowed to bear any weight on my right leg for six weeks.  That’s a long time, and I don’t know where I’m gonna be for the last half of it.  To be honest, I already have enough known unknowns in store for me in the next few weeks that I didn’t really need this one.  It’s what would be classified as an Unknown Unknown.  It’s why I stopped asking “What else can go wrong?”  The answer is never far away.

Time passes

i am now two weeks into the present hospital stay.  As one of the nurses said to me a few minutes ago, ” You’re part of the furniture now, Sue.”  Charming.  There are hints–signs, really– that I may be moved up north sometime this week.  That would be great.  At least in theory it would be.  I have no idea what it will be like.  The food is unlikely to be worse, which is an issue for me because I already have no appetite and I hardly care whether or not the food is edible.  I’m needing encouragement in that department… lest I waste away to a mere shadow of my former self.   I know it is all about the bottom line, but I can’t understand why — even with budgetary constraints — they can’t offer tastier food.  I reckon it must be costing more to serve burned food…  The longer ya cook it, the more electricity ya use!

I have no other complaints.  But give me a minute and I’ll think of something…   Haha…only kidding.  It’s not the hospital’s fault, but I have to say I’m not thrilled with my new wheels.  I can’t imagine how I would get around without it, but the frame is very cumbersome.  I guess I’m a bit cumbersome, come to that.  There should be no need for it once the bone has healed (fingers crossed), but in the meantime it definitely limits the places I can get into.  It’s bigger than a bloody phone booth!  It sort of reminds me of the Ice Capades, where skaters have to glide gracefully along on the ice, wearing a castle, or the Titanic hung over their shoulders.  I’m not saying I’m expected to glide gracefully anywhere, but I do feel like I’m carrying scaffolding with me.               MM